Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
