so that wasnt chicken after all
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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