And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
