You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize
