you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
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Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
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When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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