i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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