The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
did i walk over a car last night?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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