i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
