oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Sober January is a disaster.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
