Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
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Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize