remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I deserve this hangover.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
