guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
i think my cat just said my name.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
