bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
