Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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