wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
