dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
