Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
we're making bets on your personal life
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
