Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
