I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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