i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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