so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
