check it out our google latitudes are spooning
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
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