I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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