Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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