And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
