oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
