I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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