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this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
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