bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I need moral support for this bender
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
