It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
