I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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