why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My bed smells like the plague
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
