Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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