# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Randomize
