All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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