you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
