the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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