I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
