haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
we're so committed to being not committed
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
