I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize