It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
send nudes
from the living room?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
