You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize