Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize