Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
