You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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