We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
