No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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