What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
