it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
