so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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