I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
well you can't waste a boner
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
