If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
