she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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